今天， 哦， 今天。
我走出去看天空。 啊真黑啊。 我想， 可能会下雨。 但是我喜欢不下雨的黑云。 我认为天空大朵大朵的黑云很美， 一看就让我开心。
6pm. 黄昏马上来了， 太阳马上睡了， 不过好像天空窗户已经关了。 我想， 魔鬼会出来吗？吸血鬼会出来吗？我会认识他们吗？ 或者帮他们吗？ 也许我会像猎人一样，去寻找他们呢。
6:20 pm. 路上的时候， 我身体很放松， 但是我的大脑却在一直思考着我的一切。 天空很美， 海边的小路很有趣。 一个人都没有， 只哑到了一家黑猫。 我看着他们， 他们也看着我。 然后我看着他们慢慢走了。
6:30 pm. 到公园了就觉得更舒服了， 因为这时候吹起来一阵大风， 不停的吹。 所有的树都吹弯了腰， 好像在跳舞。哈哈， 很有趣。 让我微笑起来。
6:35 pm. 我到了足球场中心去。 每天这里都有十几个人踢足球， 也有很多人跟小狗玩。 可是今天除了我， 一个人都没有来玩， 只有我。 很安全很舒服， 我笑了。
我回过头了， 真喜欢我的脸能感觉到风。 对了， 一闭上眼睛， 我就张开我的胳膊， 好像大风把我吹走。 真想飞走。。。觉得。。。。可以。。。。可以的。
去更高， 更高， 飞走。 我在心里笑了。 更高。 我是一个人。 一个人在风中飞。。。我在天空中吗？这里不想睁眼睛， 在这里我一点都不怕， 一点都不担心。 我己没有杂念。 只在感觉着风。 我无处不在。
6:55 pm. 突然， 地球把我拖回了现实， 拖回了地面， 拖回了我刚刚站的足球场。 啊， 不是地球， 是一个声音， 什么声音吵我啊？
汪汪。。。汪汪。 听见小狗说话了。 睁眼睛了看一个小狗。 它看着我吼： 汪汪。 不过， 不明白， 听不懂他的语言。 什么意思？ 可能它警告我： “夜晚来临了， 太阳下山了。 先生， 你干什么？”
我回答： 汪汪。。。汪汪。。。我的意思是： “好的， 谢谢。 我走了”
7 pm. 我开心地回家了。
It took me a while to write this, and, yes, I did have some help with correcting this into a more readable piece. But it is a true story. (loosely)
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Saturday, June 6, 2009
I guess its been far too long since i made a post. I would say its about time I "got off my ass" and did something, but actually I have to "stay on my ass" to actually get it done.
Well, I'll just start by saying that the Chinese government has really pissed me off these past few days. Because of the Tiananmen Square massacre that took place twenty years ago, and its anniversary which was yesterday, the Chinese government has taken great measures to censor almost any possible avenue for the truth of this incident to be known among its own people.
Now, its not that I am taking some moral high ground, because I believe that everyone has their reasons for taking action or non-action or what have you. The biggest problem for me though is that it creates such a pain in the ass to research anything, find anything online, or just watch silly youtube videos that have nothing to do with China.
In fact, I have to use a proxy server almost all the time now--even just to write this blog, because of course, the entire blogspot website network has been blocked. So my personal bone to pick with the government is that I just overall feel hassled.
I don't care so much about the Tiananmen Square Massacre- no real bleeding heart from me, just to be honest. Lately found it hard to pull that emotion out.
However, lets be clear about the nature of hypocrisy, and this goes for any government. So if you want to point fingers at the U.S. government, I'll be happy to hold your hand in the right direction, and most likely will agree with you.
But let's take the Nanjing Massacre for example. Horrific tragedies. Horrific. As if the hatred for Japanese people isn't bad enough, the Chinese government is always up in arms about the Yasukuni shrine having the 14 War Criminals names. The Chinese government has gone to great lengths to keep the anti-Japan attitude in the air.
On the same hand, Tiananmen Square is a giant secret here. The public is grossly misdirected on this matter. No one really seems to know much about it.
Now you could argue that the two incidents are completely different, but in fact, they are only different in premise. But would you rather be raped and stabbed, or would you rather be run over by a tank? or just shot?
Furthermore, couldn't they use tear gas, rubber bullets, or just beat a few people here and there? I mean, was all the violence really necessary?
Like I said, my biggest beef is that it directly hinders my personal freedom. Before you run off and shout "this is China, you should love it or leave it," this is a cop out. This is a fear based ego response that is drawn from ultra patriotism.
There are no natural rights, no God's laws, and countries are molded and formed by the people who have the most power. that doesn't make it morally wrong or right to kill your own people, or to acquire other people into your fold. All i ask is that you at least be honest with yourself if your going to fuck up my day.
Well, I'll just start by saying that the Chinese government has really pissed me off these past few days. Because of the Tiananmen Square massacre that took place twenty years ago, and its anniversary which was yesterday, the Chinese government has taken great measures to censor almost any possible avenue for the truth of this incident to be known among its own people.
Now, its not that I am taking some moral high ground, because I believe that everyone has their reasons for taking action or non-action or what have you. The biggest problem for me though is that it creates such a pain in the ass to research anything, find anything online, or just watch silly youtube videos that have nothing to do with China.
In fact, I have to use a proxy server almost all the time now--even just to write this blog, because of course, the entire blogspot website network has been blocked. So my personal bone to pick with the government is that I just overall feel hassled.
I don't care so much about the Tiananmen Square Massacre- no real bleeding heart from me, just to be honest. Lately found it hard to pull that emotion out.
However, lets be clear about the nature of hypocrisy, and this goes for any government. So if you want to point fingers at the U.S. government, I'll be happy to hold your hand in the right direction, and most likely will agree with you.
But let's take the Nanjing Massacre for example. Horrific tragedies. Horrific. As if the hatred for Japanese people isn't bad enough, the Chinese government is always up in arms about the Yasukuni shrine having the 14 War Criminals names. The Chinese government has gone to great lengths to keep the anti-Japan attitude in the air.
On the same hand, Tiananmen Square is a giant secret here. The public is grossly misdirected on this matter. No one really seems to know much about it.
Now you could argue that the two incidents are completely different, but in fact, they are only different in premise. But would you rather be raped and stabbed, or would you rather be run over by a tank? or just shot?
Furthermore, couldn't they use tear gas, rubber bullets, or just beat a few people here and there? I mean, was all the violence really necessary?
Like I said, my biggest beef is that it directly hinders my personal freedom. Before you run off and shout "this is China, you should love it or leave it," this is a cop out. This is a fear based ego response that is drawn from ultra patriotism.
There are no natural rights, no God's laws, and countries are molded and formed by the people who have the most power. that doesn't make it morally wrong or right to kill your own people, or to acquire other people into your fold. All i ask is that you at least be honest with yourself if your going to fuck up my day.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Please Kill Me
Well, everything was going great. Really getting into my training. Learning actually more than my mind can handle. Unfortunately I chose the wrong restaurant to eat at, because I suffered the most horrible case of Black Plague Death Stomach Virus--or something.
Anyhow, it started at about 4 am, and from that point on I spent most of the day in bed. Luckily, Shifu Adam let us off the hook--Ben was just as smashed up as I was. We got to take a few days off to rest up and get our bodies back. Thank God. It literally felt like every cell in my body was being stretched out beyond its limit. That and the strange feeling of fever and chills.
After 8 agonizing hours of lying in bed, I decided to get up. I took one of the best showers in my life and decided to go for a stroll. I made it to the internet cafe and got online for a bit. It was everything I could do to sit in the chair. After about an hour and a half I walked to the store and downed two more bottles of gatorade. Then back to bed.
Oh yeah, and thank God for drugs-valium that is.
Today is much better. I was actually able to eat today. Much, much better.
We'll see how it plays it out from here.
Anyhow, it started at about 4 am, and from that point on I spent most of the day in bed. Luckily, Shifu Adam let us off the hook--Ben was just as smashed up as I was. We got to take a few days off to rest up and get our bodies back. Thank God. It literally felt like every cell in my body was being stretched out beyond its limit. That and the strange feeling of fever and chills.
After 8 agonizing hours of lying in bed, I decided to get up. I took one of the best showers in my life and decided to go for a stroll. I made it to the internet cafe and got online for a bit. It was everything I could do to sit in the chair. After about an hour and a half I walked to the store and downed two more bottles of gatorade. Then back to bed.
Oh yeah, and thank God for drugs-valium that is.
Today is much better. I was actually able to eat today. Much, much better.
We'll see how it plays it out from here.
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